do you solve the problems or the problems solve you?

It's been months over now. I remember
one fine day, my loved-one urged me
to write and explore this topic. I was
arguing yet I agreed, this might
beneficial to others who encounter such
situation. I'm not saying then I would
lead up a group discussion on such matter.
However, writing this mass topic around us, might
contribute various thoughts. Whether it leads better
or worse, it really depends on your good hands, my friends.

If your choice is not living alone, then it needs strong
commitment to hold hands no matter how bad the paths you
may walk. It's unlike we are having double lives that
we can easily switch and pack back to the other place
when we hit unexpected life issues on the other side.
If we keep holding on such life alternative, believe
me, substitute is poisonous. Substitute only lures one
better when one has problems, one'll never learn from
mistakes, and will never grow-up. We'll keep running
away from the life we should live and we live only in our
ideal fantasy of how life can be without holding back to
the commitment we have had.

The clue is like the little boy saying to his mom:
"If I hold your hand and something happens to me, chances
are that I may let your hand go. But if you hold my hand,
I know for sure that no matter what happens, you will never
let my hand go."
[http://woman-and-life.blogspot.com/2008/02/shall-i-hold-yours.html]

Then, how are you going to hold hands? Tends to let go
or give even firmer grasp when you hit the problem? How
if it's not only a problem? How if it becomes problems
as you are just not willing to see the bright side and
resolve them?

Problems, everyone has, who can bravely say one doesn't?
Hence, how are we going to look on it?
How to work towards it?
Are you taking the lead to solve the problems?
Or you prefer to let the problems solve you one day?

Problems, it doesn't come alone.
There're situations, multiple interventions among men
and women. It doesn't come as standalone-package.

So, how to rate problems? Do you have one or many?
Let me quote this interesting: Work Life Coach quote.
It's plugged on our wall, I don't even realize when it
was plugged there.

It's OK to have personal problems. WE ALL DO.
What's NOT OK is to do NOTHING about them.

Basically it's about how we communicate towards it.
How positive we are to admit there're problems and
willing to find ways to resolve it together. Without it,
yes.. I would agree, it will never been resolved. You'll
keep hitting same issues every now and then. Until
one day, you'll declare you're both are not soulmates.
[Anyone can give perfect answer on what soulmate is?]

All improvement will require change BUT NOT ALL change
will result in an improvement.

Raising your hand and few slaps on your loved one's face
is a change, but it's not an improvement for any
circumstances. It's a communication in a hand but it
communicates nothing rather than hurts at all means.
People rising hands on his loved one may fulfill
the ego, achieving every emotional requirements to win the
game. However, being the loved one who gets slaps is not
going to be healed in no time.

Have you ever been slaps just because you want to express
your affection and kisses? There're people who can show
her deep love and care eventhough in a fight. Sometimes,
there're strong needs come from within as if to hold and
express the situation -- as understandable, simply saying
"i understand and still love you" is not appropriate at
all.

However, when the other just cannot understand the feeling,
is it wise to raise a hand?

Problems, we all have, who doesn't? Those don't
have problems are those love ignoring them and hold
a wishful thought of how wonderful world in their own
scene. Does it solve anything lies in between?

The answer is in your wise hand....
[10 March 2008]

a wishful thanks for you,
for the intentional visits,
for the brave spendings on those nites,
for those affection nites,
and most of all,
for the recent birthday gift.
yes.. it was the best of all year,
indeed...
[http://han88fia.multiply.com/reviews/item/2]